“Wishing you wellness, happiness, free from suffering, living a life of peace and freedom.”
~ Buddhist Metta Prayer
Yesterday, Spencer’s grandfather passed away, at the ripe old age of 96. He led a productive and good life, and will be honored by a military salute at his funeral, for having served in World War II, being part of the brigade which stormed Normandy. In his later years, he would sometimes relive those horrific moments. And I pray that at his time of death, they were resolved.
He had been in a nursing home for many years, as is the case for most people, who’s will to live outlasts the body’s frail nature. His quality of life was gone, so in that, his passing is a blessing.
I was chatting with a friend over Easter, who recently survived a stroke. She was saying that she’s become fascinated by what a true miracle the human body is. And this contemplation has left her feeling happy, in a state of awe. It’s easy to take this miracle for granted. So today, please take a moment to honor your own self, your frail human body, and the miracle that you’ve been given.
Yet, just as the body keeps on living without our consciously doing anything, so too, one day our body shall cease, and we shall pass into the realm of the unknown.
Spencer’s favorite quote or life philosophy is that by Hunter S. Thompson:
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!”
But what if that isn’t the case. I think that many of us like to think we aren’t afraid to die. But the truth is, I do think we fear the days leading up to it. How will we handle those final days, when our body is totally worn out, and can no longer care for itself? How will we keep our minds calm and happy when the body is suffering?
Thich Thanh Tu writes:
“First of all, death is not frightening. Everybody thinks that birth is happiness, death is suffering; birth is happy and death is scary. As for all of you here – Are you afraid of dying ? Actually, dying is not frightening at all. Old age and sickness are two out of four kinds of suffering which the Buddha had mentioned, namely, “Birth, Old age, Sickness, and Death”. Old age and illness are suffering. If one is no longer concerned with old age and illness, then one is free. In brief, if one dies, one leaves old age and sickness behind – that means one should be happy for one is finally free from them.”
“Secondly, as Buddha always says ” Where there is life, there is death”. Life and Death are natural phenomena, no one can escape them. Like the Buddha, He lived and died when He was 80 years old. Even for the Buddha, the enlightened one, when His body deteriorated, He had to let it go. Therefore, death is natural and it happens to us all, with no exception. To be frightened of the inevitable is not wise. To be worried of the unavoidable is useless. Death will come to us all, and we all have to accept it matter-of-factly. It is a natural process, there is no need to be scared.”
“Thirdly, if we practice well during our life, adhering to the 10 precepts (much like the Christian 10 Commandments), one will be reborn in heaven with better conditions than in this human realm. As one leaves one’s ‘rotten’ body, one obtains a ‘better’ body in one’s next life, so there is no need to worry.”
Some strong words of advice for today, for both the living and the dying:
1) Do not get angry- pay attention to the dying moment, take care of your death. Do not get angry- at this critical moment, if you are angry, mad, you will be reborn in a lower realm.
2) Forgive and forget – do not think of your enemies or vengeance, because you will reincarnate and take vengeance at each other endlessly. When this occurs, you accumulate more negative deeds and cannot go on with the right practice.
3) Do not become attached to loved ones or wealth, etc. This attachment will lead you to lower realm (e.g. animal realm’s).
On the contrary, at the dying moment, think of good deeds.
1) Firstly- think of helping poor people the best you can.
2) Secondly – as a Buddhist, think of offering to the Three Jewels (Buddha, Dharma, Sangha); or as non-Buddhist, think of taking refuge to the Three Jewels in order to cultivate a your spiritual path.
3) Thirdly- think of freeing all captured animals, and save them from being killed.
By practicing good deeds, we gradually walk on the right path, and these are good thoughts that we should have at our dying moment.
It is my prayer for Papa, that as his soul is being released from this Earth over the next 3 days, we all offer him good thoughts and prayers, that he was able to forgive and be forgiven.
I am of the nature to grow old.
There is no way to escape growing old.
I am of the nature to have ill-health.
There is no way to escape having ill-health.
I am of the nature to die.
There is no way to escape death.
All that is dear to me and everyone I love
are of the nature to change.
There is no way to escape being separated from them.
My actions are my only true belongings.
I cannot escape the consequences of my actions.
My actions are the ground on which I stand.
– Buddha –
Amen. Rest in Peace Papa. You lived a good life.
Resources:
http://www.urbandharma.org/udharma2/aged.html
http://hayagriva.org.au/?page_id=13#3
